LIFE & LOVE as a 41 Year Old DIVORCED QUADRIPLEGIC 💔♿❤️

Life loves a good plot twist, doesn’t it? I never imagined becoming a quadriplegic—or a divorcee, for that matter—but here I am, navigating uncharted territory with all its messy beauty.

Honestly, it’s probably for the best that we can’t predict the future. Would we even know how to move forward if we could see all the challenges ahead?

DATING AS A 40-SOMETHING QUADRIPLEGIC: THE REAL TALK

Over the last 18 months, people—both disabled and able-bodied—have asked me what it’s like diving into the dating world at my age, with my wheelchair in tow. Spoiler alert: It’s complicated.

Let’s be real: online dating isn’t easy for anyone. But throw in the fact that I’m a quadriplegic woman in her early 40s, and it gets… interesting.

Here’s the thing, though: my wheelchair weeds out the wrong people instantly. And I love that. Why? Because I don’t waste time on those who can’t see beyond the physical. Sure, there are a few duds (and some guys with, um, questionable intentions), but I’ve met genuinely awesome humans along the way.

THE LEARNING CURVE OF LOVE (AND “ARE WE DATING THE SAME GUY?”) 🤔

Did you know there’s a website called “Are We Dating the Same Guy?” It’s like a telenovela meets public safety tool, where women compare notes to weed out serial daters or players. Fascinating, right? Thankfully, I haven’t needed it—but it’s wild to see the stories!

WHAT 41 YEARS (AND A FEW CURVES) HAVE TAUGHT ME

Here’s what I’ve learned about dating in my 40s:

* I know who I am.
* I know what I value.
* And I know what I won’t compromise on.

The insecurities that used to keep me up at night? They’re still there—but I no longer let them define me. Yes, being in a wheelchair comes with challenges (bladder, bowel, muscle spasms—oh my! 🫠), but it’s my life. And I no longer feel the need to hide those parts of me.

Now, I’m looking for a partner who accepts me fully: quirks, insecurities, and all. Someone to laugh with, grow with, and—let’s be real—argue with now and then.

THE CONFIDENCE SHIFT: I’M FINALLY IN THE DRIVER’S SEAT (METAPHORICALLY) 🚗

When I was first injured, I didn’t understand why anyone would want to date someone in a wheelchair. But now? I’m in control. I’ve embraced my life and all its beautiful complexity, and I’ve found confidence I didn’t know I had.

THE BIG REVEAL (KIND OF 😉)

Am I dating right now? Yes, but I did have to kiss a handful of frogs along the way. After all, in the beginning, dating is a numbers game. I’ve been seeing a wonderful gentleman for a while now … Stay tuned on that one… ❤️

FINAL THOUGHTS

This post isn’t just about love—it’s about authenticity. Life is messy, and that’s okay. We’re all more than just our jobs, titles, or LinkedIn profiles. So here’s to showing up, imperfections and all, and sharing the full spectrum of who we are—because that’s where the real connections happen.I