I JUMPED OUT OF A PLANE ššŖ QUADRIPLEGIC SKYDIVING AT 14,000 FEET
Because if youāre going to live life on the edge, make sure itās properly harnessed. Skydiving has been on my bucket list since foreverābut I didnāt get the chance before I broke my neck in a shallow water dive and became a C6 quad, paralyzed from the chest down with limited arm and hand movement.
And yetā¦ I still jumped.
With my legs hanging out the door of that plane, 14,000 feet in the air, I had one thought:
š āIāve arrived.ā
MEET THE DREAM TEAM
I met the All Veterans Group last year when we went racecar driving together (becauseā¦ obviously). Their motto? āWe want to make the world a better place.ā And they mean it. This nonprofit is made up of active duty service members, veterans, patriotic civilians, and their families. They:
šŖ Jump into stadiums at events around the country
šŖ Create unforgettable experiences
šŖ Help people with disabilities live their wildest dreams
With the help of the Golden Knights and a top-notch engineering crew, they designed a custom harness just for me:
ā
Protected pressure-sensitive areas (huge when youāre paralyzed)
ā
Locked in my arms so they didnāt go flying
ā
Allowed my legs to be lifted safely during landing
It was so effective, theyāre now working on a patent.
WHAT SKYDIVING FELT LIKE AS A QUADRIPLEGIC
Honestly, itās hard to put into wordsābut Iāll try:
š Like falling into freedom
šØ Like fear turning into laughter mid-air
š¤ļø Like weightlessnessā¦ in every way
š§ Like shutting off the noise and turning on wonder
We freefell for 90 seconds at 120 mph before the chute opened. And then? Quiet. Peace. Absolute joy. I couldnāt stop smiling. I even convinced my boyfriend to jump with me (Heās a keeper!)
IāM AN ADRENALINE JUNKIEā¦ WITH A SPREADSHEET
Yes, I chase wild experiencesābut always with precision. I research, plan, and partner with people who prioritize safety and accessibility. Before the jump, someone told me:
š¬ āYouāll always have one more landing in life than you do takeoffs.ā It made me laughā¦ but it also stuck with me. There are moments in life when the only thing between you and joy is a leapāone made with courage, trust, and a really good team.
WHATāS NEXT?
Who knows. But hereās what I do know:
š” I live with intention
š” I appreciate every moment I can do something extraordinary
š” I say yes to things I once thought were impossible
If sharing this helps even one person take their own next bold stepāwhatever that looks likeāthen every second of that freefall was worth it.
(Behind the Scenes Video coming soon)
THE 10-10-10 RULE: THE BRAIN HACK THAT SAVED MY BUTT (LITERALLY)
Letās face it: your brain is dramatic.
Not theater-kid-in-high-school dramatic. More like toddler-who-dropped-their-Fruit-Roll-Up-in-a-sandbox dramatic.
Every day, your decisions are being pulled in a three-way battle between:
š§ The impulsive part that wants dopamine right now
š§ The responsible part trying to avoid long-term chaos
š§ And the existential part that wonders, āWill this matter when Iām 85 and crocheting revenge sweaters in a retirement home?ā
Thatās why you need the 10-10-10 Rule.
WHAT IS THE 10-10-10 RULE?
This isnāt just another productivity hack invented by a tech bro who drinks kale for breakfast and has never known the betrayal of a soggy burrito.
This is neuroscienceādisguised as a life raft.
Whenever youāre about to make a decision that might involve drama, cake, or texting someone whose name you shouldāve deleted long agoā¦
Ask yourself:
How will this choice affect me in…
- š 10 minutes
- š 10 months
- š 10 years
It gives your brain a timeout. A little pause button. A moment to stop the emotional toddler from hijacking the steering wheel of your life.
YOUR BRAIN ON EACH TIMELINE
read more…HOW TO FLY WITHOUT BREAKING YOUR $40,000 WHEELCHAIR (OR YOUR SPIRIT)
There are a few things I wish someone had handed me early in life:
š A how-to guide on being paralyzed with style
š A manual on avoiding airport catastrophe
š And maybe a coupon for lifetime bubble wrap
I didnāt know what I didnāt knowāuntil I learned the hard way. And by hard, I mean metal-on-metal-cargo-hold hard.
As a full-time wheelchair user paralyzed from the chest down (with limited arm movement), Iāve been through the ācongrats-your-chair-is-now-art-suppliesā phase of air travel way too many times.
Over the years, Iāve worked with engineers, wheelchair techs, caregivers, and fellow flying wheelchair warriors to build what I call my Cirque du Soleil of chair loading. Itās a high-stakes dance starring my caregiver and some very expensive hardware.
š„ The video below? Itās part choreography, part survival ritual.
THE ONE PROBLEM š¬
Even with all that prep? Thereās still a 50/50 chance something breaks. Why?
COMPASSION CRISIS: PLEASE PAY ATTENTION
(Could this be you? Or someone you love?)
I wish I could say this is one of my usual dark humor posts. Itās not. It is, however, one of the most necessary things Iāve written in a whileāfor all of us, as human beings navigating a system that often forgets the human part.
72 HOURS AGO, EVERYTHING SHIFTED š°ļø
My wildly energetic, sharp-as-a-tack 79-year-old German mother hit a wall. She had chills, a high fever, violent shaking, and looked like a truck hit her. We thought it might be a UTIāeasy mistake to make given the symptoms. We got her antibiotics. They didnāt help. We went to urgent care. More meds. No improvement. By the next morning, her fever spiked to 107Ā°F. I rushed her to the emergency room.
We spent seven hours in the ER together. I didnāt leave her side. I was her advocate. Her voice. Her bodyguard in a wheelchair. The diagnosis? A severe strain of rhinovirus. A virusāno easy fix. No magic meds. We just have to monitor her breathing, hope it doesnāt progress, and let her rest. Thatās the backstory.
But thatās not what this post is about.
WHAT I WITNESSED IN THE ER š
While we were waiting for blood test results, I watched something that made my stomach turn.
read more…THE TIME HAS COMEā¦ MEET MY āPERSONā š
A few weeks ago, I made a post about dating as a divorced, 40-year-old quadriplegic woman. Toward the end of it, I mentioned someone specialāa human whoās been in my life for nearly a year and a half now.
We made the intentional decision to keep our relationship offline for a while. Just the two of us. Quietly getting to know each other without the noise of likes, comments, or unsolicited opinions.
But now? The cat is officially out of the (adorably judgmental) bag. š
MEET DAN.
Dan Gizzi and I met on Match, both of us dipping our toes into the wild world of online dating. There were zero expectations.
Dan says he was just hoping for a few good meals. I was experimenting with what dating could even look like as a divorced woman with a disability, still learning where I stood with it all.
And thenā¦ something unexpected and beautiful happened.
WHAT STARTED AS DATING TURNED INTO FRIENDSHIPāAND THEN PARTNERSHIP.
Over time, we began building a real connection. Not just as romantic partners, but as friends who truly see one another.
We are very differentāand weirdly perfect for each other. Dan is calm, thoughtful, intelligent, creative, and the best kind of cheerleader. I, on the other hand, am basically an Energizer Bunny with WiFi: always talking, always building, always moving, and notoriously difficult to slow down.
He does that. Gently.
WE BALANCE EACH OTHER.
BEING BRAVE TODAY
(Because Some Moments Take Time to Face)
Signing up for the National Storytelling Competition made me revisit a photograph Iāve never shared before
I blocked off four-hour chunks for book editing. Progress update? Still on round oneā¦ with three more to go. Turns out, writing is way easier than editing. Worse? Reading your own thoughts out loud, knowing the world will soon have a front-row seat to your inner monologue.
This week, I revisited the section about the moment I broke my neckāspecifically the 22-hour journey through a hurricane as my dad rushed me to emergency surgery. He knew I was on a time clock. I didnāt. He watched his daughter die in real time.
I tell my story all the time, but reading those words again? Tears. Streaming. Down. My. Face.
GRIEF IS FUNNY LIKE THAT
IF YOU OPPOSE AN ACRONYMāBE SPECIFIC. āš¤
Lately, Iāve seen a lot of bold statements about getting rid of DEI. But letās be clearāif youāre against something, name it.
Stop hiding behind letters. Spell it out:
āI OPPOSE DIVERSITY, EQUITY, AND INCLUSION.ā
And while youāre at it, letās get specific:
š¹ DIVERSITY? Too many different perspectives making decisions?
š¹ EQUITY? The idea that barriers should be removed so more people can access opportunities?
š¹ INCLUSION? Making sure people arenāt shut out just because they donāt fit the mold?
DEI ISNāT JUST AN ACRONYMāITāS ABOUT BELONGING. š”āØ
And hereās the kicker: Companies that fail to create a sense of belonging lose over š° $300 BILLION š° a year in employee turnover. Because when people donāt feel valued, they leave. And when they leave, organizations lose talent, innovation, and institutional knowledge.
HEREāS WHERE IT GETS PERSONAL. š¦½š¬
Iām a quadriplegic. A full-time wheelchair user navigating a world that wasnāt designed for me. So when someone says theyāre against DEI, I hear:
ā āMaking spaces accessible is too much of a hassle.ā
ā āPeople like you should just figure it out on your own.ā
ā āOpportunities should stay limited to those who already have access.ā
If thatās your stanceāfine. But own it. Because if you canāt say the words āI OPPOSE DIVERSITY, EQUITY, AND INCLUSIONā out loud, maybe, just maybe, itās worth reconsidering why youāre saying it at all.
WHAT DO YOU THINK? LETāS TALK SPECIFICSāNOT JUST ACRONYMS. šš”
“FROM BED-BOUND (Literally) TO BREAKING BARRIERSāWHAT SUCCESS REALLY MEANS.” š„š
Thank you to Los Angeles Magazine for featuring my TEDx talk as one of the top 30 impactful talks of this century! A huge congratulations to my fellow TEDx’ers!!
I woke up to a friend sending me the article, and for a solid minute, I thought I was being punked. (Whereās Ashton Kutcher when you need him?)
But it got me thinking… how do we define success?
RE-FRAMING SUCCESS š
Is it:
š° The size of your paycheck?
š A fancy job title?
š How many views you get on your TEDx talk? (š)
Most of us have an invisible scoreboard in our heads, constantly tallying the ways we should be winning. But real talk:
Who created that scoreboard? And does it even matter?
HEREāS THE THING ā”
Weāve become victims of our own success.
š¹ We get anxious about being anxious.
š¹ We get stressed about being stressed. (Quick, whereās the vodka or that 11 p.m. commitment to a sugar spiral?)
š¹ Weāre on a treadmill to nowhere, sprinting toward a finish line that doesnāt exist.
Itās like trying to win a race where the prize is… a never-ending email chain. Or worseāa reply all disaster.
read more…LIFE & LOVE as a 41 Year Old DIVORCED QUADRIPLEGIC šāæā¤ļø
Life loves a good plot twist, doesnāt it? I never imagined becoming a quadriplegicāor a divorcee, for that matterābut here I am, navigating uncharted territory with all its messy beauty.
Honestly, itās probably for the best that we canāt predict the future. Would we even know how to move forward if we could see all the challenges ahead?
DATING AS A 40-SOMETHING QUADRIPLEGIC: THE REAL TALK
Over the last 18 months, peopleāboth disabled and able-bodiedāhave asked me what itās like diving into the dating world at my age, with my wheelchair in tow. Spoiler alert: Itās complicated.
Letās be real: online dating isnāt easy for anyone. But throw in the fact that Iām a quadriplegic woman in her early 40s, and it getsā¦ interesting.
Hereās the thing, though: my wheelchair weeds out the wrong people instantly. And I love that. Why? Because I donāt waste time on those who canāt see beyond the physical. Sure, there are a few duds (and some guys with, um, questionable intentions), but Iāve met genuinely awesome humans along the way.
THE LEARNING CURVE OF LOVE (AND “ARE WE DATING THE SAME GUY?”) š¤
Did you know thereās a website called āAre We Dating the Same Guy?ā Itās like a telenovela meets public safety tool, where women compare notes to weed out serial daters or players. Fascinating, right? Thankfully, I havenāt needed itābut itās wild to see the stories!
WHAT 41 YEARS (AND A FEW CURVES) HAVE TAUGHT ME
Hereās what Iāve learned about dating in my 40s:
* I know who I am.
* I know what I value.
* And I know what I wonāt compromise on.
The insecurities that used to keep me up at night? Theyāre still thereābut I no longer let them define me. Yes, being in a wheelchair comes with challenges (bladder, bowel, muscle spasmsāoh my! š« ), but itās my life. And I no longer feel the need to hide those parts of me.
Now, Iām looking for a partner who accepts me fully: quirks, insecurities, and all. Someone to laugh with, grow with, andāletās be realāargue with now and then.
THE CONFIDENCE SHIFT: IāM FINALLY IN THE DRIVERāS SEAT (METAPHORICALLY) š
When I was first injured, I didnāt understand why anyone would want to date someone in a wheelchair. But now? Iām in control. Iāve embraced my life and all its beautiful complexity, and Iāve found confidence I didnāt know I had.
THE BIG REVEAL (KIND OF š)
Am I dating right now? Yes, but I did have to kiss a handful of frogs along the way. After all, in the beginning, dating is a numbers game. Iāve been seeing a wonderful gentleman for a while now ā¦ Stay tuned on that oneā¦ ā¤ļø
FINAL THOUGHTS
This post isnāt just about loveāitās about authenticity. Life is messy, and thatās okay. Weāre all more than just our jobs, titles, or LinkedIn profiles. So hereās to showing up, imperfections and all, and sharing the full spectrum of who we areābecause thatās where the real connections happen.I